Scare Your Soul

What is the first thing to go when you feel disconnected from yourself?  

Asking for a friend, and that friend is me. 

For me, I try to convince myself that I can handle it all and then things start to pile up and unravel. I end up with 34 post it notes scattered across my desk and unreadable reminders on my phone that I cannot decode. And I start to get that brain fog despite my mind going a mile a minute. I feel disconnected from myself. Sound familiar? 

We all go in these waves throughout the year when we are on our game and then begin to feel some separation from who we are whether it is due to fear, distraction or the hustle (the constant state of busy, not the dance).  I am hard pressed to believe anyone can say they don't experience these periods of disconnection because if they don't then A) they are lying to you (and themselves) and B) then they are not human. 

Allow me to clear the air on something: as humans, it's okay to not do it all, have it all or be it all. No one has their shit together. No one knows what they are doing all the time.  No one is crushing it 24/7 despite what the squares on Insta may project. But the collective {we} have concocted these notions that this is all possible and on top of that, have convinced ourselves that everyone is achieving these ridiculously high standards of living.  

Enter fear, doubt, perfectionism, anxiety, stress, etc. {Side note: My girl Christine Barnes serves up doses of real talk on this very subject + reminds me daily of the every day acts of unconventional courage-check her out.}

It's just not possible. And deep down we know that right- so, then why do we keep believing it? I emphasize we because I'm looking at myself here too. 

Real talk: exactly one year ago I launched Soul Connect. In January 2017 I officially went live with this coaching + connection movement and have hit the ground running without stopping. Because I seriously love this work. Like, really love it. Can't stop thinking about it, I am constantly creating and I just want to do it all, right now.  For so long I was feeling unsettled in my life.  And during those years (still at it btw) I dedicated so much time and energy to my own soul connection which led me to uncover my purpose and lead me to where I am today. So you can see why I am all in, all the time. 

Fast forward to now and well, I am feeling the burn.  I am not burned out by my work with Soul Connect. I adore my clients and this Tribe and I am so unbelievably grateful for all that has unfolded this year. The burn I am feeling is the one that comes with bending boundaries, not slowing down, and not giving myself space to recharge completely. I feel like I plugged myself into the charger to get that little bit off battery boost then unplugged and used up all the power but I haven't been patient enough to fully charge to 100%. You feel me?

This summer I took a weekend away for a little solo retreat. It was exactly what I needed and loved every second of being on the lake. However there is one thing I wasn't so good at: I didn't fully disconnect from technology. I still had my phone and computer and although I definitely took time away from it, I was still connected to it each day.  So when I returned home, I felt great but not completely recharged. 

Fast forward to now: When I was approached to be a new Scare Your Soul Ambassador for this year's challenge, I found myself debating on what action I was going to take to bust out of my comfort zone.   Truthfully at first I tried to come up with all these real cool ways I could face my fears but I quickly realized that the one thing I kept coming back to was going screen free.  I tried talking myself out of it saying that was so #firstworldproblems and that it wasn't "big enough" or "impressive enough".  But then I realized, that was my fear talking. So I committed to taking a weekend off completely from the screens. 

How is this out of my comfort zone?  

Because I have become hyper aware of how much my phone has been in my hands this year.  I love me some Instagram-like, to the point I want to write them a thank you note for creating the platform because I have met somany INCREDIBLE people.  I love being able to connect with you through the squares and how together we can redefine how social media can be with one unfiltered and real talk post at a time.  Despite the incredible things my devices are able to do for me in all areas of my life, I have come to rely on them way too much.

But what I have also noticed are the realities of being a new solopreneur (especially the realities of also is working a full time gig to make my purpose driven gig a reality). That reality is that the screens are my life line.  It's how I communicate, create, connect and serve.  So with that being said, what I realized I have to do is set my screens aside and get real about setting clear boundaries around how I use them.  And for me, that is scary because fear trolls in with that old story of perfectionism and FOMO. By choosing this as my challenge, I am opting for courage and dousing that fear with a hella amount of self love. I need to give my mind, eyes and soul a break and reignite some boundaries.  


I want to be able to show up fully charged for YOU.  And I want to be sure that as much as I talk about connecting to one another, we remember to first focus on the connection we have with ourselves.  My challenge choice to disconnect is really so that I can fully reconnect with my soul.  I want to be at the green light 100% fully charged with a clear head and open heart ready to serve you and the world with my soul.  

Because I foresee some detox screen sweats, I plan on giving my phone/laptop to a family member to hold so I don’t get tempted.  I give myself permission to wake up with the sun, put pen to paper, spend as much time outside as possible, keep my nose in a book. Ready to stretch my comfort zone and embrace the offline living!

In order to celebrate these small steps of reconnection, I am hosting a {free} local Sunday Soul Session for anyone who wants to get off the screen and into the green for a special coaching + connection nature hike. Join me on Sunday October 29th at 11am at the Cleveland Metroparks Rocky River Reservation.  We will be breathing in some fresh fall air, making eye contact and diving into facing fears with courage and I even have surprise up my sleeve for anyone who joins!

Social media are great for developing community, but for true belonging, real connection and real empathy require meeting real people in real space and real time
— Brene Brown, Braving the Wilderness

And for all my soul sisters local and beyond, I challenge you to join me in this challenge. Eleanor Roosevelt once famously said, “Do one thing a day that scares you.”  On three days in October, we all get to do just that. People from around the world will be participating in this free, self-generated exercise in small moments of courage. You can join me in this FREE Scare Your Soul challenge the last weekend of October by simply signing up below and committing to going out of your comfort zone-whatever that means to you. If you find yourself comparing or minimizing let me remind you that your fear isn't real but your feelings are and whatever it is, nothing is too small to throw courage at. You do YOU. I'll be right there with you.  Just call me on my land line.

Katie Kurtz